I Reach for My Phone Before I Pray

Some mornings I pick up my phone before I say anything to God. Not because I planned it. It's just there. The alarm is on it. A message might be on it. And then I'm already in it.

I used to call that practical. Checking if anyone needed me. Checking the weather. Checking one thing.

That's not checking. That's me handing the first minutes of the day to whatever is loudest.

What Gets There First

The morning is short. Once the house is moving, I'm not going to get a clean hour. I know that. So those first minutes matter more than I want them to.

If they go to a screen, prayer doesn't disappear. It just shows up late, trying to talk over a mind that's already full. News. A work thing. Someone else's morning. Then I sit down and wonder why I can't hear anything.

I used to think the problem was discipline. Like I needed a stricter rule about the phone. I don't think that's it. I think I reach for it because sitting still asks something of me, and the phone doesn't.

The Waiting Part

There's a line in the psalms I keep coming back to for this. It isn't advice about waking up earlier. It's a voice aimed at God at the start of the day, before the requests even land.

In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly. Psalm 5:3

Wait expectantly. After the voice. After the laying down.

I skip that part. I fill the morning, then I try to pray on top of it. There's not much room left to wait for anything.

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The Minutes Before Anything Else

I still reach for it. Some mornings I catch myself with the screen already lit and I put it down. Some mornings I don't.

I'm learning to leave it face down long enough to say one true thing first. Not a speech. Not a rule I can fail before breakfast. Just a voice aimed at God before the day starts talking.

That's not winning a fight with my phone. That's living into giving God those minutes, on the mornings I actually do it.

I don't always. The pull is still there when I wake up. I'm not pretending otherwise.

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Trent Jones is the author of the Forged Agents blog and builder of "Reflect", a daily reflection companion for living in the present, in peace, with joy.